The Final Eight

The Maple Leaf is a massive, hulking, well...tree. He is the biggest Guardian and an immovable object which is great provided the bad guy walks right by him. He can control plant life which is kind of useless unless he knows where those plants from Jumanji are. "Always quick with a joke or a sarcastic barb, the Maple Leaf often disarms his opponents by bringing levity to tense situations." Fantastic news if The Wet Bandits happen to be running by. "He fires sticky 'sap' bombs from his fingertips that trap his opponents like an insect in amber," so I guess in 65 million years someone will be able to use his DNA to bring back us back after we go extinct.  

The Senator has his values kinda backwards. Apparently he didn't get the memo that slavery is bad and sold himself into it. His bravery in being a slave/gladiator allowed him to become Russel Crowe. He's over 2000 years old. You know how most people suck at driving when they're 70? Imagine this guy. Yikes.

A guy who loves the Miami nightlife, The Panther is yet another hero who doesn't take his job too seriously. Half man and half panther (who knew?), he can claw through any six inch steel walls. Now that the bad guys know that, they just have to make their fortresses 7 inches think and they're all set. I did learn something new though, apparently a shadow has elements. Go figure.

In trying to make this guy as diverse as possible, they forgot to give him a power. Seriously, this guy is a cop and that's about it. Other than some pretty cool weaponry, he's got nothing.

Relaxed and young, The Duck is a "rebel with a trust fund." You know those kids who grow up in a nice neighborhood with proper parents and a great education who try and act all gangster? That's this guy. His suit allows his to breathe underwater for a small amount of time and he can fly in short bursts. Or, you know, be a duck. He has a bunch of specialized surfboards and boots that serve the same purpose, they both allow him to glide quickly across the surface of the water. Can't he just pick one?

I got nothing. The Blue is actually pretty awesome.

The Islander is one of the toughest Guardians. I would be too if I had a metal shark suit on and chainmail suspenders, whatever the hell that is. He's kind of a shitty sailor in that what seaman enjoys being on land more? He can control ocean currents and, yet again, can control the weather. Come on, this is getting ridiculous now. They need to come up with new ideas, that's the fifth hero already that can control the weather.


















The Thrasher doesn't have much going for him other than the fact he can fly, the term 'hand cannons' doesn't give him much credibility either. He can fly, like, really really fast. He has titanium armor and can fire mini cruise missiles which is pretty cool. But those hand cannons... 

Offseason Recap-Atlantic Division

There is still plenty of work to be done this offseason, but here is what has happened so far. I will be doing this by division, with teams in order I think they will finish with projected conference ranks included as well. I will look at signings, trades, departures while providing as much contractual information as I could find. Let's begin, shall we?

Pittsburgh Penguins - 2
Key Signings
7/1: D Zbynek Michalek (PHO) 5 years, $20 M
7/1: D Paul Martin (NJ) 5 years, $25 M
7/2: F Ryan Craig (TB) 1 year, $500,000/
7/3: LW Brett Sterling (SJ) 1 year, $500,000/
7/7: D Andrew Hutchinson (DAL) 1 year, $500,000/
8/20: RW Aaron Asham (PHI) 1 year, $700,000
Trades
6/25: D Dan Hamhuis from PHI for 3rd round draft pick (2011)
Departures
D Sergei Gonchar (OTT)
D Jordan Leopold (BUF)
D Mark Eaton (NYI)
LW Alexei Ponikarovsky (LA)
LW Ruslan Fedotenko
RW Bill Guerin
What To Expect
Its not an easy task to replace one of the top offensive defenseman of this generation in Sergei Gonchar, but GM Ray Sherro did the best he could in signing Paul Martin and Zbynek Michalek. Martin's underrated offensive skills should help Pittsburgh's transition game and Michalek will be a step up in the defensive zone. A team that was already weak on the wing lost Alexei Ponikarovsky, Ruslan Fedotenko, and Bill Guerin. The signing of Aaron Asham brings grit and defensive responsibility to their forward lines while providing time and space for the likes of Sidney Crosby, Evgeni Malkin, and Jordan Staal.


New Jersey Devils - 4
Key Signings
6/30: RW David Clarkson (re-signed) 3 years, $8 M
7/1: D Henrik Tallinder (BUF) 4 years, $13.5 M
7/1: D Anton Volchenkov (OTT) 6 years, $25.5 M
7/1: G Johan Hedberg (ATL) 1 year
7/28: D Mark Fraser (re-signed) 1 year, $500,000
Trades
6/19: C Jason Arnott from NAS for RW Matt Halischuk and 2nd round draft pick (2011)
Departures
D Paul Martin (PIT)
C Rob Neidermayer (BUF)
LW Andrew Peters (FLA)
LW Jay Pandolfo
D Mike Mottau
C Dean McAmmond
G Yann Danis
What To Expect
The Devils probably aren't done this offseason, as they still have the Ilya Kovalchuk situation to deal with. With Paul Martin having signed with rival Pittsburgh and long-time grinder and fan-favorite Jay Pandolfo asking to leave, they have few, but important roles to fill. GM Lou Lamoriello brought in an old face in Jason Arnott who has already made his mark in Devils' history. Henrik Tallinder was brought in to replace Paul Martin and Anton Volchenkov gives the Devils the intimidating physical presence they haven't had since Scott Stevens retired.


Philadelphia Flyers - 5
Key Signings
6/30: G Michael Leighton (re-signed) 2 years, $3.1 M
7/1: Braydon Coburn (re-signed) 2 years, $6.4 M
7/1: Sean O'Donnell (LA) 1 year, $1 M
7/1: LW Jody Shelley (NYR)
7/9: Nikolai Zherdev (KHL) 1 year
7/13: Dan Carcillo (re-signed) 1 year
7/22: Darroll Powe (re-signed) 1 year, $700,000
7/22: David Laliberte (re-signed)
Trades
6/19: D Dan Hanhuis and 7th round draft pick (2011) from NAS for D Ryan Parent
6/25: 3rd round draft pick (2011) from PIT for D Dan Hamhuis
6/26: 7th round draft pick (2010) from CAR for F Jonathan Matsumoto
7/1: D Andrej Meszaros from TB for 2nd round pick (2012)
7/19: D Matt Walker and 4th round draft pick (2011) from TB for LW Simon Gagne
Departures
G Ray Emery
D Lukas Krajicek
RW Aaron Asham (PIT)
What To Expect
GM Paul Holmgren didn't waste time committing to Michael Leighton as the number one goalie, signing him the day before free agency started. With the team thats in front of them, Leighton and Brian Boucher probably won't have to steal many games for Philadelphia. Sean O'Donnell and Andrej Meszaros create a much improved third defensive pairing over last year when coach Peter Laviolette was wary about giving time to the combination of Ryan Parent, Oskars Bartulis, and Lukas Krajicek. Not much has changed on the forward line where Philadelphia is among the deepest in the league. Longest tenured Flyer Simon Gagne was traded for salary cap reasons and replaced by Nikolai Zherdev who spent last season with Mytishchi Atlant of the KHL.


New York Rangers - 11
Key Signings
7/1: Erik Christensen (re-signed)
7/1: Martin Biron (NYI) 2 years, $1.8 M
7/1: LW Derek Boogaard (MIN) 4 years, $6.4 M
7/1: C Vinny Prospal (re-signed) 1 year
7/2: F Brandon Prust (re-signed)
7/9: D Dan Girardi (re-signed)
7/12: RW Jeremy Williams (re-signed)
7/27: Alexander Frolov (LA)
Trades
5/25: D Jyri Niemi from NYI for 6th round draft pick (2010)
6/26: 6th round draft pick (2010) and 2nd round draft pick (2011) from CAR for D Bobby Sanguinetti
7/9: D Steve Eminger from ANA for LW Aaron Voros and LW Ryan Hillier
7/19: D Matt McCue from ANA for LW Thomas Zaborsky
8/2: F Todd White from ATL for F Patrick Rissmiller and F Donald Brashear
Departures
G Alex Auld (MON)
LW Jody Shelley (PHI)
C Olli Jokinen (CAL)
F P.A. Parenteau (NYI)
C Jamie Lundmark (NAS)
What To Expect
Not a whole lot has changed for the Rangers as GM Glen Sather has had an unusually quiet offseason. Martin Biron is a proven goalie but won't see much ice time behind Henrik Lundqvist who will likely reach 70 games played for the fifth consecutive season. Other than depth defenseman Steve Eminger being brought in, not much has changed on the back end. Alexander Frolov will try to find his niche in New York and take some of the offensive pressure off of Marian Gaborik. Letting Olli Jokinen go falls under the addition through subtraction category.


New York Islanders - 15
Key Signings
7/2: D Mark Eaton (PIT)
7/2: D Milan Jurcina (WAS)
7/2: P.A. Parenteau (NYR)
7/2: F Zenon Konopka (TB)
7/15: C Robbie Schremp (re-signed)
7/15: D Dustin Kohn (re-signed)
7/27: LW Matt Moulson (re-signed) 1 year, $2.45 M
8/3: LW Jon Sim (re-signed) 1 year
8/18: C Andy Hilbert (MIN) 1 year
Trades
6/25: 6th round draft pick (2010) from NYR for D Jyri Niemi
7/30: D James Wisniewski from ANA for 3rd round draft pick (2011)
Departures
G Martin Biron (NYR)
LW Jeff Tambellini (VAN)
LW Sean Bergenheim (TB)
D Freddy Meyer (ATL)
What To Expect
Neither New York team had busy offseasons as GM Garth Snow is either content to let the young players develop or New York is simply not an attractive place for free agents. They added toughness in the form of Zenon Konopka and P.A. Parenteau will be given a chance to see what he can do on the forward lines. Mark Eaton, Milan Jurcina, and James Wisniewski all help the defense but they simply won't be enough to lift the Islanders out of the conference basement.

Sources: NHL.com free agency tracker, TSN.ca tradecentre